Backward Steps

I guess it's only appropriate to start off by saying WAY TO GO PHILLIES! My dear husband Steve, like the entire city of Philadelphia, has been waiting for this day for the past 25 years and it's nice to see him so happy. Landon and Logan really are our good luck charms, there's no doubt about that.

The last few days have been ok, but not great. Foremost, some encouraging news: Landon was finally taken off the oscillator and put back on the traditional ventilator. What a tremendous relief. Unfortunately, neither him nor his big brother have been doing very well with their breathing on the conventional vent for the past two days. They have been desatting alot and their blood gases have been poor (high CO2 levels) thus leading to their vent settings being turned up to higher levels. It appears they are much farther away than I initially hoped they were from being moved off the vent and onto the CPAP, which is more gentle on their delicate lungs.

Yet another development is that the doctors suspect Logan may have an infection and this may be contributing to, or compounding, his breathing problems. Blood cultures were taken this afternoon but the results cannot be finalized for another 72 hours. However, early treatment is crucial to reverse a preemie's symptoms so the doctors went ahead and started him on a few broad spectrum antiobiotics until they are able to determine if he indeed does have an infection, and if so, pinpoint exactly where the infection lies. The fear is that he will get so sick they will have to stop his feeds again, thus inhibiting his ability to gain the weight and strength he so desperately needs.

I suppose I shouldn't be too surprised at the latest turn of events given that the boys' relatively short stay in the NICU thus far has taught me that for every 1 step foward, they're going to take 3 steps backwards. I only wish the peace and relief I felt on those good days were enough to sustain me during those awful days when the backward steps are seemingly endless....